"Slut: Someone who is having more sex than you."
I wasn't sure what to expect from this little nugget of literature but I was automatically drawn in by the title. The first few pages provided a back story on how this book came about. A few teenage girls discussing sex and playing the numbers game. Yes, the number of sex partners each had. Long story short, one of the girls' body count was WAY higher than the others. Even I was a little shocked. But then I had to question, why am I shocked? Is it because she's so young? Is it because she could be exposing herself to various STDs? Would I feel the same way if a guy had the same count? (For the record, the answer is yes to that last question.) Either way, the concept got me interested enough to keep reading.
Then the facts came out. The one that struck me the most was that 39% of the women surveyed said when asked, they lowered the number of sex partners they had. Their reasons all varied from shame to it's none of their business, but 39%?! What's the issue? If it's high, it's high. Get tested. Often. If it's low, that's cool too. But did you know some women actually increase the number to make themselves sound more experienced? Now if that's not wacky I don't know what is. Women are lying both ways just to normalize their relationships and sex life. But for what?
Another little tidbit I learned from this book was that another way women regulate their number is by going back to exes because that means you technically aren't adding another body to the count. WHAT. You tolerate ain't ish folks just to avoid adding another someone in the mix? I mean I get it. Kinda. But wow.
And then there's the whole double standard which could be a separate blog post on it's on. Guys put up bets (someone in the book actually) for who can sleep with the most women but a woman having sex with two guys within a small time frame is automatically a slut. How does that even make sense? It doesn't. But that's how society has taught us to see it. Men can be sexually exploratory but women have to be in love and committed and all that stuff.
I will never forget I was watching some documentary about how sex is viewed in different countries. I can't remember what country this particular segment was from but it was about how the teenage girls carried condoms just like the boys. Surely in America her carrying condoms alone would probably deem her promiscuous, but I always viewed it as her being just as prepared as a guy would be. Better safe than sorry.
"Sex should be enjoyed by all but, to enjoy it, taking responsibility for your actions is essential."
That single quote pretty much sums up my own personal views, part of why I enjoyed this book so much; because it gave me a chance to really think about my own views on sex. Who am I to judge someone just because their body count is different than mine. As long as they are being responsible and not putting others at risk, it's none of my business. And none of yours.
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